Try a Softer Tone, Just One Thing by Rick Hanson

How do you talk to people? The Practice  Try a softer tone.

Why? When our kids were little, I'd come home from work wanting some peace after the daily roller-coaster and often walk into a living room full of stuff - toy trucks, tennis shoes, bags of chips, etc. Irritated, the first words out of my mouth to my wife would be: "How come there's all this mess?" Understandably, after a day chasing children plus juggling her own work, Jan would feel unfairly criticized and sputter back at me. Then there'd be a quarrel or a chilly silence. Not good. And it all began with the tone I used. Linguists like Deborah Tannen have pointed out that most communications have three elements, which I'll illustrate with the example above: * Explicit content - What led to these objects being on the floor? * Emotional subtext - Irritation, blame; startling, the first thing I said; no establishing first of a positive context (like asking about her day before mentioning the clutter) * Implicit statement about the nature of the relationship - I'm on top and get to judge how well she is doing her job as a mother. Many studies have found that the second and third elements - which I define in general as tone - usually have the greatest impact on how an interaction turns out. Since a relationship is built from interactions, the accumulating weight of the tone you use has big effects. In particular, because of the "negativity bias" of the brain - which is like Velcro for uncomfortable experiences but Teflon for pleasant ones - a repeatedly critical, snarky, disappointed, worried, or reproachful tone can really rock a relationship; for example, John Gottman's work has shown that it typically takes five positive interactions to make up for a single negative one. As I gradually learned to use a softer tone, my wife got happier with me - and our living room became less cluttered.

Review for "Guardians of the Gate" by Gloria F. Orenstein

The Surrealists suggested that it would be interesting to consider the continuum of our dreams as the foregrounded narrative of our life---punctuated by moments of awakening from sleep as simply moments of interruption of the dream life continuum---the reverse of the way we think of these states now.  Yana Womack Castle in “GUARDIANS OF THE GATE: An Investigation of Numinous Presence, ‘Visions of the Divine’ in Dreams” created the narrative of her life from the perspective of dream experiences spanning over a decade in which she encountered deities and numinous presences in various forms.  In her numinous dreams, Yana received teachings and empowerments from Buddhist masters, yoginis, medicine women and shamans through methods of energetic transmissions and other means often accompanied by states of profound ecstatic bliss. She also interacted with lions, deer, snakes, flowers and ocean waves, flew above the clouds, met with guardians and shapeshifters and travelled to places inside the earth to receive counsel and healing from her allies.

Tibetan dZi beads

The dZi bead is part of a "family" of beads known as etched beads. This ancient process of decorating chalcedony (a kind of quartz) with a chemical treatment that changes the surface composition seems to have arisen in the Indus Valley Civilization and later moved into Iran in Sassanian Times. In general it can be said that a dZi is an etched agate or chalcedony bead that has the universally recognized patterns: eyes, a circle and a square, double wave forms, and certain stripes and waves. The most desired of these are those with eyes, especially the nine-eyed dZi (which lends more credence that these beads are from the time of the Bon faith, as nine was an important number in that religion whereas it is not important in the Buddhist religion). Also these beads are tubular, generally 1-2 inches long, though there have been cases of longer ones, must contain the shine associated with good dZi, and be in relatively good shape. One interesting type that does not represent the typical dZi at all, but is considered in their family is the "luk me" dZi, or "sheep's eye". This is a tabular bead with circles representing eyes or moons on either or both sides. It protects the owner from the "evil eye"The dZi, particularly those of sought after patterns, command high prices and are very difficult to come by. Most Tibetans will not let go of a dZi once they have it because it provides them with protection, and may cause bad luck if they were to get rid of it.

DNA Can Be Influenced And Reprogrammed By Words And Frequencies by by Grazyna Fosar and Franz Bludorf

THE HUMAN DNA IS A BIOLOGICAL INTERNET and superior in many aspects to the artificial one. The latest Russian scientific research directly or indirectly explains phenomena such as clairvoyance, intuition, spontaneous and remote acts of healing, self healing, affirmation techniques, unusual light/auras around people (namely spiritual masters), mind’s influence on weather patterns and much more. In addition, there is evidence for a whole new type of medicine in which DNA can be influenced and reprogrammed by words and frequencies WITHOUT cutting out and replacing single genes. See more

Comparative study on Meditation and Hypnosis

The Taoist scholar Livia Kohn has written an excellent book called "Meditation Works" that looks at Taoist, Buddhist, and Hindu meditation traditions. She draws a strong parallel between meditation and hypnosis, and explores the many ways meditation works with the subconscious. Kohn views meditation as a form of self-hypnosis and a means of reprogramming the subconscious mind.

Self-criticism: The way you break your own heart by Saran Kaur

Most of us would say that one of the most painful experiences in life is being criticized or judged by our loved ones. 

Yes, it feels painful and yucky to feel rejection or “not feeling enough” in the eyes of those that we deeply care for and desire to be loved and accepted by, but there’s something that is more painful than any rejection that we can receive from others.

It’s the rejection and criticism of ourselves.
 
Self-criticism and judgement is the way you break your own heart. Self-criticism and judgement stem from holding ourselves to an external measure of performance and/or being. It’s striving for an unattainable goal of perfection that can never be reached.

Perfection is a tricky issue. First of all, it doesn’t exist. There is no fixed place called “PERFECTION” that we can hang out in if we work hard enough.

Life is an ongoing calibration process, and ongoing learning game! But the concept of perfection serves us in subtle ways that we might not recognize at first. We often times use perfection both as a safety-zone as well as a way of punishing ourselves. Perfection is an excuse and a safety zone. 

When the Pain-Body Awakens by Ekhart Tole

The pain-body awakens from its dormancy when it gets hungry, when it is time to replenish itself. Alternatively, it may get triggered by an event at any time. The pain- body that is ready to feed can use the most insignificant event as a trigger, something somebody says or does, or even a thought. If you live alone or there is nobody around at the time, the pain-body will feed on your thoughts.

Suddenly, your thinking becomes deeply negative. You were most likely unaware that just prior to the influx of negative thinking a wave of emotion invaded your mind—as a dark and heavy mood, as anxiety or fiery anger. All thought is energy and the pain-body is now feeding on the energy of your thoughts. But it cannot feed on any thought. You don’t need to be particularly sensitive to notice that a positive thought has a totally different feeling-tone than a negative one. It is the same energy, but it vibrates at a different frequency. A happy, positive thought is indigestible to the pain-body. It can only feed on negative thoughts because only those thoughts are compatible with its own energy field.

Are We Meant to Meet the People We Meet? by Jessica Cooper

Are we destined to meet the people we meet?

Yes.

I know we are.

Every person we meet, we are meant to meet. No matter how long they stay in our lives.

Every person has something to teach us. Whether they stay for an hour, a day, or 10 years, they are there for the right amount of time. That amount of time is simply how long it takes you to learn the soul lesson. There are 6 billion people in this world, nothing is an accident.

If the experience seems negative, and this certain person really irritates you, or you feel like you cannot connect to someone, that experience presents itself in your journey to give you an opportunity to learn patience, understanding, or perhaps empathy. It gives you an opportunity to see yourself even in someone your ego categorizes as different, less than, or not good.

Skydancer: Personal mentoring for women. A few spaces available.

Namaste! Just to let you know I have a few spaces available for personal mentoring. Please contact me if you are interested.

Personal mentoring may include:

Counseling: Transpersonal, spiritual, intuitive.
Hypnotherapy: Repatterning Hypnosis, Depth Hypnosis, age regression, past life regression.
Empowerment practices: EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), personal mythology, self-esteem.
Movement: Authentic Movement practice, sacred dance, yoga, QiGong.
Bodywork: Reiki treatments / attunements, massage instruction.
Breathwork practices: Tibetan Buddhist, Bon and yogic breathwork.
Sound healing: Tibetan singing bowls, sacred sound practices.
Indigenous healing methods: Shamanic journeys, creating rituals, oracles.
Sexuality: Based on the work of Julie Henderson.
Spirituality: Buddhist practices, meditation instruction, earth-based, women's spiritual traditions.
Dreamwork: Spiritual dreams, numinous dreams, dream incubation.
Creativity: Art as transformational healing, Sandtray, journal writing.
Sacred travel: Pilgrimage to sacred sites (local and Nepal).
Supports for healing: Aromatherapy, elixir therapy, herbal remedies, tarot.

To schedule a consultation, contact Yana 510 809-6575 or email yanacastle@comcast.net.

Start a new life every morning

We sometimes wake up fresh in the morning yet still go through the day half asleep. Our busy 21st century lives overwhelm us with a relentless stream of immediate tasks. We lose sight of how precious it is just to have a human life.

This is an awareness that we need to feel in our hearts. I would like to share with you a practice that I call 'living your whole life in a single day.' You can do this by starting with this thought in the morning: 'I am starting a whole new life. It begins right now'. Initially, leave yourself a note at your bedside to remind you, and then slowly cultivate the habit of waking up with this thought.

Your body is fresh from the night's rest; when you wake up with this awareness, so does your mind. Ask yourself what kind of person you want to be in the life that you will live today. Throughout the day, remind yourself that your life is happening right now. In the afternoon, check to see how your life is going and readjust as needed. A whole lifetime of possibilities stretches out before you every moment.

This is the basic truth of interdependence. Conditions are constantly shifting, and what seemed impossible earlier can suddenly become possible. Every moment counts. Every action counts. A single kind act can have a positive impact on the future of many others you share the earth with. You can change the course of the future in any moment. Do so consciously, and the whole world will benefit —His Holiness, the 17th Karmapa